Abusive systems.

I write once again. 

The idea of unsafe space is practically unheard of in this country. The fact that the home where you grew up could be the unsafest space out there sounds sacrilegious to people. The idea that family is essential is ingrained in Indian society to such a level that nothing could happen without them. 

On a call today, I was asked if I stay 70 km away from my home, why can't I come to my home over the weekends. It was such a normal thing to expect, and guess what? Since they were prospective future employers, I couldn't tell them the truth. That's how this society has been built - be hush about all the abuse you face, especially if that abuse stems from the family - how can your family even abuse you? It is so normalised that the use of the word abuse is frowned upon. 

Anyway, I was further instructed to be present at my home within 2 days so that my verification can take place, no questions asked if I could be present or not or if I even wanted to be there. None of that matters, you want to be employed by the government, you do as they order. This is shitty at so many levels. I am an adult, why do you need to do a background check on my whole family? Why me being a law-abiding citizen not good enough? Why does it have to happen at your residence only, why can't it happen in some official space?

Even if nothing abusive happens if I go there, the space is still abusive to me in my memories. I don't wish to visit it, but I literally don't seem to have any option. It is fucking disgusting what kind of system we have built. 

You remember how recently there was news about Elon Musk's child having nothing to do with Musk, now that they are 18? Well, in India, that is not even an option, it is legally impossible to leave your parents. Forever whenever I have to apply to any opportunity, I will have to provide details of my family members, and forever they will be kept in a loop of what is happening in my life. This is absolutely outrageous, but this is the reality.